3 pax for ruck. See BB below. As 7:00 am approaches, 3 ruckers gather 6 additional pax, including 1 FNG guest of Tecumseh, who appears to be a NO-SHOW. We’ll start calling you George. Pax looking around and are dismayed to discover the bait and switch. Coco is not here. Shank delivers the disclosure with the practiced art of Rush Limbaugh setting a Lib straight, then the pax were off. Warm-up jog to the kiosk with a plank hold on the way to pick up the sixes. Warm-up: SSH, mountain climber, planks, Low plank hold. Tecumseh arrives, looking the none better (George it is, as in NO-SHOW), in time to finish with Imperial walkers.
Mosey to the boat ramp parking lot, lineup adjacent to the fence to complete 30 cc Captain Marvel plank extensions. Starting in plank position, right hand to the fence post-hold, left-hand to fence post-hold, right hand down, Left hand down. When both hands are on fence post, body should be fully extended. (Crowdpleaser and its new, at least to me)
Mosey to the playground with stop on the way for crab planks waiting for the sixes. At the playground, Cindy is calling out: 5 pull ups, 10 merkins, 15 squats, 10 rounds.
Mosey back to the kiosk with stop on the way for crab planks waiting for the sixes. At the kiosk. — YHC would later realize he should have taken the Dale Carnegie course in communication. Trying a new exercise with rowdy pax and not communicating effectively is a plan for disaster. Good idea, bad execution. — Whilst pax are in squat position, YHC attempted, with the assistance of Water Wings, to demonstrate new exercise that was superbly executed in a video shared by YHC’s nephew, Splash from F3 Nola. Part of the problem was the requirement of two pax members to execute said exercise. It might help, correction, it would be extremely beneficial, to have demonstrated said exercise with a similar sized pax member. Water Wings is a big boy. P1 assumes plank, P2 holds ankles of P1 whilst in squat position. This is a 4 cc exercise. 1. P2 holding P1 ankles, P2 stands, 2. P2 executes flawless shoulder press up, 3. P2 returns press, 4. P2 squats while P1 completes a merkin. A couple of the pax looked at YHC as if he were about to deliver a grilled cheese without the triangles, “you can’t serve that!” As Calli will likely say, the problem was not the execution, but the gall to think this was a good idea.
YHC calls out 10 oyo and flapjack.
So by now you can imagine what is going on with the pax. The sun is coming up over the kiosk, which by now has become Grand Central Station with people fulfilling their New Years resolutions. A bunch of men are in these awkward positions. Tecumseh says something about his back (uh huh?) and refuses to subjugate hisself to this enlightenment. Shank is now shuddering as if he had been violated, but feeling the need to have a smoke, and then later believing he should at least have bought his partner dinner. Callie recomposes, you can just see that spark in his eye, where his fingers are itching to castigate YHC in the F3 Blogosphere. Verbally, it was immediate. Fartman is utterly humiliated when his next door neighbor, an elderly lady with a collection of Cherub Babies purchased from QVC, approaches and says in her soft grandmotherly tone used only with a child that has profaned her sensibilities with, “Mr. Peterson, Oh my”. Term Paper, the true friend he is, later offers his condolences, secretly telling himself to call Smokey to set up an intervention. He later offers his support, stuttering something about not fully understanding, and that he would have completed the exercise had he just known the correct way to complete the exercise, but all the while knowing he will never be faced with having to do this again. Mumble chatter was at an all time high, even the fng jumped in.
Something I have learned from F3, is that we are frequently faced with difficulties, rebukes, near mutinies. Sometimes it helps to be a little self deprecating, stop what you are doing, and move forward, or backward. YHC had planned for several rounds of this “Samsung S7” (for lack of better name at this time), but immediately forged a new plan.
Backwards run, not mosey to top of hill and back. Water Wings, with his youthful exuberance launches with Phelps flare up the hill, but fails to medal with his Lochte exaggeration. So promising (sigh). FNG Blue Star had an incredible showing and toughed out YHCs repeated attempts to break the pax. All the right stuff.
Mumble chatter is still highly elevated. This castigation of YHC has the inertia of a Freighter. YHC calls out 15 burpees oyo. Calli with his superior, yet nubile intellect, asks if YHC said 10. Nope he said 20, followed with backward run to gate and back.
Mumble chatter continues, Mucho Chesto follows with another backward run.
Bruce Lees with another backward run.
15 more burpees and another backward run.
MC is becoming more manageable. Head to Billy Run road for Hammers waiting on the sixes.
Pax are in hammer position, backs to the senior center, waiting on the start. PBX, with the practiced art of an enlightened Tibetan monk, request that all pax turn to the left when they start. Tecumseh, now exhibiting mild forms of humility, echoes “Go”, and the pax are off, AYG to the Senior Center. YHC missed, but heard the pileup at the start. Later, as we circled up, Calli modestly accepts responsibility for the pile-up. It had something to do with his new Velcro sneakers Allison gave him for Christmas. Instant Karma
Circle up, we’re done. Coco was missed.
10 pax with fng Blue Star, a Bidness broker from Queens. YHC pulled a rookie move, and started in on the announcements before even naming fng. Composure was recompiled, narry a beat was skipped.
Announcements: K2C. As far as the twittersphere is aware, Monday’s A-Team is scheduled as normal. And as I recall, YHC has the Q.
Prayer concerns: there were quite a few. Keep all the pax in your prayers.
YHC took us out.
Without much exaggeration, YHC remains about 10% effective in launching new F3 exercises.
You men are great, putting up with me and all these shenanigans. And though I felt like a piece of balsa wood being sharpened for a fight today, you made me better.
———-
Ruck:
Coupons were 40 lb slosh pipe and one heavy @$$ 1600d sand bag. Head off to the Sertoma shelter. In the shelter, pax 1, amrap sand bag dead lifts while P2 & P3 run the parking lot loop with ruck. Rotate through the pax.
Repeat with L/R sand bag jump overs.
Repeat with amrap merkin, pull sandbag left, merkin, pull sandbag right.
Repeat with sandbag lunges, lowering sandbag to ground
Head to kiosk for sandbag dead L/R shoulder lifts while P2 & P3 run the hill. Rotate through the pax. Followed with ruck overhead flutter kicks.
Head back to start. Finish with overhead ruck press and hold.
