When plans go awry…

17 PAX enjoyed a ClusterQ from the creator of the term “ClusterQ”. Yeah, it was that kind of morning. 43ish degrees and clear skies greeted the PAX. YHC checked the watch…dead. Perfect…hey Burt, what time is it? After watching an internal struggle to round up to 5:45 or give us another 10 seconds, YHC decided it was time to go.


Jog to the Billy Run starting line and take a right. Head halfway down the hill, and then circle up for SSH, Good Morning, Arm Circles forward and reverse, Overhead Claps, and Moroccan Night Clubs. Oh, we have a new guy.  He looked familiar so I thought he’d already been to F3. Plus he had gloves and other appropriate attire. Turns out that Bartman is a good friend and didn’t let his friend suffer (too much). Disclaimer was given, so we headed out to see what TOC could screw up for YHC this morning.


Head to the bottom parking lot and on toward the baseball fields, stopping at the rock pile to get an Ego Rock. “Are we traveling?” asked the PAX with nary an answer. YHC wanted to push the PAX beyond their comfort level. Once everyone had a hoss of a rock, YHC took off toward the nearest ball field.

This is where things got iffy. YHC heads to the dugout, but the gate is locked. What? Really, TOC? YHC ran to the other dugout…yep, locked. Hmm, maybe it’s just this field. So YHC led the PAX to the second field, all of whom are still hefting their bigg’uns along. NOOOOPE. Field 2 is locked as well. If you could’ve heard YHCs thoughts in that moment, you might think less of me.

Welp. TOC wins the battle. But I swear on my dead dog’s life (RIP Lucky), I WILL WIN THIS WAR!!!

So…ten minutes in and we’ve wandered aimlessly the entire time. That’s a good start, Sam. Well done.

Usually YHC is good with an improv Q (hell, I do it almost every time I lead), but today was different. I had actually had a plan. And as soon as I came across those locks, I was toast. The mental game was lost. We circled up for some curls, and YHC called on his loyal friend, Riptide, to lead the PAX in cadence while YHC tried to shake off the disappointment of a failed plan and quickly think something else up.

Riptide, the ever-gracious guy that he is, obliged. From that point on, he relentlessly heckled YHC’s every move. The ClusterQ was in full effect.

YHC led the PAX back toward the rock pile and out to the parking lot. In pairs (and later, in 3s), the PAX took turns running the perimeter of the lot while the others held various plank positions. When everyone had gone, we did it again, but with Squat hold and various Mary exercises called.

When finished, the PAX returned their rocks, then followed YHC (well, Khakis, really) on a backwards run up to the crosswalk. Once there, drop and gimme 20 merkins. Run to the dale and cozy up to the foot of the hill. Count off 1s and 2s, then 1s run the hill twice as the 2s bang out 20 CDDs. Flapjack. YHC checked his watch. Right, still dead. Bartman gave the time, then we lined up shoulder to shoulder for a little Tunnel of Love.

After that, there was so much Cluster, I’d had enough. We ran up the hill one last time then headed for Billy Run Lane. 1s lined up…GO! 2s lined up…GO!


Heels to heaven, Weezy Jeffersons, Rosalitas, Hello Dollys, LBCs…that’s enough


  • Count-o-rama: 17 Fearless Fiends
  • Name-o-rama: Still 17- 3 RESPECTs, 1 hate, 13 mehs
  • Announcements: 3rd F every Wednesday, Convergence with Churham this Saturday at the site of Thin Blue Line at 7am. MaBell and Callahan will carry the CARPEx flag. Y’all better show out and not make us look like fools. If you didn’t do the Bull, this is your shot at redemption.
  • Prayer concerns: Burt’s aging relatives, Aristocrat’s friend Kristen and her family, Pet Sounds’ father-in-law(?) Tom, who has some concerns post bypass surgery, and Chimichanga’s 2.0, Liam!
  • YHC took us out.


  • I coined the term “ClusterQ”, and even got it added to the Lexicon after a particularly raucous and disheveled Burt Q. The idea was, “Hey, if this guy can Q, I sure as hell can Q.”
  • During announcements, Riptide ever-so-delicately challenged the PAX to step up in 2017 and lead a workout, ending with “if Callhan can walk us around the park for 45 minutes, you can Q,”
  • Ah, the exact intent of the ClusterQ was fulfilled today. I feel…complete?
  • The fact that the M and I started sleep training on our 6 month old probably didn’t help my improvisation abilities this AM. I had been up since 3am and was feeling twitchy.
  • Khakis’ thing is the backwards run. Who knew?
  • Saban’s thing is running with a big @$$ rock, evidently. Dude got some speed for Christmas!
  • Speaking of Christmas gifts, Riptide no doubt got a brand new pair of sassy pants from Santa. The mumblechatter was THICK from Ripper this morning.
  • Riptide is much like me in the fact that he only picks on the ones he loves.
  • He must adore me!
  • I cherish you too, Rip. Glad to know we share the same feelings.
  • Pet Sounds and Angry Elf were my guinea pigs this morning on the rock laps. When they got back, both looked pretty beat. It let me know that I did a good thing.
  • Yogi is possessed.
  • Hey, uh…Bloomin’ Onion and High Heels…It’s not always this bad. I promise! You just caught me on an off day.
  • Okay, fine. This wasn’t my worst Q ever, but it was bottom five, I’d say.
  • Alright, that might not be true either. But I am capable of better Qs.
  • Yeah, I think that’s general enough to be true!
  • Moonshine felt so bad for me that he came up to me afterwards and reminisced about coming to a Q of mine at Pullen a year and a half ago and mentioned, “You’ve come a long way”.
  • Oh man…how bad was I at Pullen?!?
  • You’d think after…*checks spreadsheet*…24 Qs this year alone that I’d be a little better at it. Yikes.
  • Churham is in for one helluva treat this Saturday! I’m gunna ClusterQ them into 2025! They’ll never know what hit ’em!
  • *MaBell stares blankly at his computer screen*
  • *MaBell suddenly regrets allowing Callahan to Co-Q the convergence*
  • *MaBell unexpectedly resigns from his self-appointed Nantan position for his lack of sound judgement*
  • *MaBell quickly re-self-appoints himself as Nantan b/c he knows Callahan will call dibs when word gets out*
  • *Mabell celebrates his excellent judgement*
  • Well done, sir. That’s why I look up to you.
  • Figuratively, of course.
  • My childhood dog, Lucky, was a heck of a dog. It got a little dusty here in the office when I wrote about him above. I poured one out for him.
  • Like, literally, I poured out an entire mug of coffee into my trashcan just because the symbolism means that much to me.
  • I know what you’re thinking…
  • I never had a dog named Lucky. We did have a dog named Taz, however. Not really sure why I went with “Lucky” above. Anyway, Taz was awesome. He would fearlessly jump out in front of cars on our country road and bite at their tires.
  • He died when I was in high school. It was devastating.
  • And he didn’t get hit by a car. The neighbors poisoned him. I wish I was kidding with you.
  • Long story short, our neighbors had all sorts of exotic pets, like kangaroos and guinea turkeys and even a zebra. Taz would terrorize the living hell outta these strange animals. Our neighbors got fed up and poisoned him with Freon. It was traumatic.
  • We had another dog before Taz, named Onyx. She got hit by a car on the highway. But she sucked so I don’t really care about that.
  • We also had a Parakeet that we creatively named Larry Bird.
  • Indiana is a weird place.
  • See you in the gloom.


Workout Date:
The PAX:


  1. Shut-In

    If I’m not going to get as much of a workout due to the ClusterQ I sure do enjoy getting a lot of laughter out. Between Monday’s and today’s I’m having a BLAST this week haha! Feels like the week between Christmas and New Years. Love it. Can’t wait for Large to make Burt cry tomorrow too. He’s probably going to ban any and all jack webbs and/or plank jacks. #payback

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