YHC tweeted out that the beatdown at DZ would be dependent on the number of PAX in attendance, a tried and true method fathered by Ollie. The same Ollie that was not present this morning. Hmmmm. Anyway, the tweet stated that if we had an odd number of PAX, we’d go for a nice run. An even number of PAX would have us do a traditional boot camp workout.

The commentary came in fast and furious, and was pretty well split. Shutty wanted to run, saying his body couldn’t handle another boot camp workout this weak (not a typo). Riptide and Banjo poo-pooed the run because…well, I just don’t think they like getting out of their comfort zones much. Banjo mentioned he was bringing an FNG and that said new guy wouldn’t like a run. Interesting…if the FNG would have showed up, we would have done boot camp. Funny how that worked out. And Riptide griped that he could run on his own time. By that logic…you could do boot camp by yourself too. But it’s a lot more fun with company. #wisdom

Warm Up

SSH x 20
Good Morning x 10
Mountain Climber x 20

The Route

Take a left out of the Danger Zone toward Cary Parkway. Take a left on Cary Parkway and run to the intersection at Harrison Avenue. First stop:
Squats x 20
Merkins x 20

Run south on Harrison, down the mile long hill to Dynasty Drive (Burt puts the Nasty in Dynasty, by the way). Second stop:
Squats x 20
Merkins x 20

Run west on Dynasty for a few yards, then hang a right on the Black Creek Greenway, taking it back toward North Cary Park, stopping at the Bridge Over Troubled Waters. Stop #3:
Squats x 20
Merkins x 20

Lastly, cross the bridge and complete the final climb back up to the picnic shelter. #asthmaattack

Once everyone arrived, grab a bench for a little arm action, lest we forget our various ‘Ceps (bi’s and tri’s, ya dig?)
Dips x 15 IC
Irkens x 15 IC
Derkins x 15 IC
Irkens x 15 IC
Dips x 15 IC

LBC x 20 IC
Hey Dolly x 20 IC

Count-o-rama (completed at the beginning of the workout): 13 PAX
Nam-o-rama: still 13 – 5 RESPECTs, 1 hate, 7 others
Announcements: No one felt like jabbering about it, so check the website. Q-School, F3 Dinner, K2C’17, etc. Oh, and sign up to Q!!! Do it.
Prayer Requests: Ma Bell’s nephew diagnosed with diabetes, good news for Grease Monkey and his wife but still prayers for more blessings, YHCs in-laws trying to become Damned Yankees.

– I don’t actually like to run, but I scoped out this route a month ago and was waiting until it was bright enough in the mornings to use the greenway. When Google Calendar told me I was Q’ing today, I knew this was my chance.
– I gave the alternative in case the good Lord had a different plan for us this morning, but He wanted us to work on some cardio today. Good thing, too, cuz I would have had to wing it if we had an even number.
– I’m glad the heavy rain held off. There is nothing worse than chafed nipples because you ran in the rain, amirite?
– Just me? Whatevs. #iknowthetruth
– Riptide is so sassy. It truly keeps me on my toes. He’s got the most sass of anyone I know. He beats Franklin by 6 miles.
– Kotters, Nutmeg! He even shook my hand and thanked me after the workout. Believe it or not, it’s the first time that’s ever happened to me. I must be pretty good at this thang!
– Burt loves nothing more than to point out my terrible push-up form. It’s really not all that bad until I do push-ups next to Ma Bell. Then I look like a complete jackhole.
– It’s like the time when I was in college and a bit overweight. I would go to the bars with my 300 pound buddy so as to make me look better in comparison.
– Dude still got all the girls. #worstwingmanever
– #amIoverdoingitwiththehashtagstoday?
– The guy in the cubicle behind me has Ludacris stuck in his head. It’s the most entertaining thing I’ve experienced in this job.
– Youtube Area Codes by Ludacris.
– Actually, you know what? Don’t do that. Seriously, though. Don’t do that.
– I was surprised Coney was there this morning. It was his holiday yesterday. I figured he still would have been chugging Dos Equis at 5:45 this morning.
– My favorite quote of the day: Ma Bell in his best NC State accent – “That creek is SWOLE”.
– Oh, you didn’t know NC State had it’s own accent? If you like fishing, wrasslin’, BFTs, and terrible basketball, you probably know how to use the NC State accent.
– Second favorite? Largemouth: “Naw, man. Back in the day, Merle Haggard was HOT. Megababe.”
– Okay, maybe he didn’t say that.
– Franklin wasn’t too happy today. But Goose was, so that’s all that really matters, right?
– Hermes said he was enjoying the run. I honestly couldn’t tell if he was being serious or sarcastic.
– Hermes also sounds like “The Bull” when he counts cadence. But Shutty wouldn’t know anything about that.
– Airbag would have been proud.
– Speaking of Airbag, where’s he been? I bet he’s heartbroken that his boy Moline abandoned him. Such a sad tale.
– Banjo be fast as hell for an old guy.
– Term Paper and Burt had a conversation that I didn’t understand a single second of. Something about Dynasty and Dallas. I thought they were talking about the Cowboys, but I was wrong.
– It’s too bad Ollie wasn’t around to join us. I think he would have liked the run this AM.
– Shutty! Don’t forget to post the Strava link somewhere!
– Franklin…oh, Franklin. When will you learn to check twitter before posting?

Six, Saban, HATE, Callahan