The day started like any other at True Grit. 16 men rolled into the gloom of the Dam Hill, planted the VSF, punched their time cards and set off to work. There was little frivolity this morning. The PAX had arrived with purpose. They came prepared. Wendell Gee brought gloves. One even drove all the way from Lake Norman for the experience. And the weather, the weather was perfect. Like MacGruber’s hair. Or Epoxy’s constant mumble chatter.
First things first. No FNGs. Standard disclaimer given. Epoxy begins to mumble.
Warm Up
Circle up for Plank Jacks x20, Arm Circles x10 F/R and that’s enough of that.
Burpee Loop
Run upper loop w/ 6 stops (top of dam, upper entrance, top of hill, bottom of hill, water fountain, dam again). 10 Burpees at each stop. Then AMRAP LBCs for the 6 before heading to the next stop. Somewhere along the way, Wendell questioned YHC on the appropriate use of AMRAP (as many reps as possible), as it was really AMRAP until time was called. Which isn’t truly AMRAP, but a modified AMRAP or sorts. All this was clearly a distraction by the Pax to slow down the beating. This isn’t my first rodeo. At the end of the loop, back at the dam, we did 20 American Hammers IC.
Transitional Thang
Head back up the hill. Alternate Bear Crawl 20 paces with Lunge Walk 10 paces along the guardrail until it runs out. At the top, WWIIs for the 6. Then Freddie Mercuries x20 IC.
Modified Dora
Mosey to the picnic tables. Partner up. Partner 1 runs a loop around the lot. Partner 2 begins prescribed exercises on the benches. At this point the Pax wanted more clarification. Where is this loop? Around over there? Or just right over here? So a demonstration lap was preformed with the entire Pax running the proposed loop. Got it? Good. Moving along. Exercises were aggressive: 100 Step-Ups (too wet for Box Jumps), 200 Derkins (ouch), 300 Dips (not gonna do it). An audible was called to cut the Dips to 200 reps because, A) time was running out, B) our shoulders were going to fall off, or C) both A and B. Ding-Ding. Prisoner Squats for the 6. Mainly because Epoxy was already doing Squats instead of doing any Dips whatsoever.
Shortcut w/ Sidebar
Time was running low, so we took a shortcut directly down to the floating dock. At this point the Pax were looking for a way out. The walkway was too slippery. The dock was slick and unstable. Their panties were riding up to high. Once the ladies all arrived, we knocked out some Single-Leg Squats L/R x10 each. Then hiked up our skirts and headed for home.
Mary
Back at the lot we circled up for 2 minutes of the Protractor. Modified AMRAP, until time was called.
COT
Numbers and names. Welcome to BamBam. Kotters to Claven. And MacGruber prayed us out.
Announcements
Haven House Battle of the Bags Cornhole Tournament is Sunday, May 21st at Trophy Brewing on Maywood. This is a fun event for a great cause. Last year was a huge success. Find a partner and sign up now. Or, if you can’t make it, think of making a donation. Aye? http://www.battleofthebagsnc.org/
Mole
• T-Claps to ManRam and MacGruber for pushing the pace out front.
• Linda predicted the Burpees. But not the Dips. #crowdpleaser
• As we passed a group of older women running the opposite direction, Zima got a “looking strong” call out. They were clearly hitting on him. Too bad Costco fartsacked.
• BamBam gave us T-Claps on the AO. #whenthedockisarockin
• And in all his preparation to make sure he had gloves, Wendell Gee then left them in the parking lot. No one dared get within 5 feet of them. So we just left them there. Hazmat team may have been called in later.
And that’s all I got. Honored as always.
Shaggy
