Man oh man…writing in this Text Editor brings me back. Waaay back to 2001 when I took an HTML class as a freshman. In high school. Ya’ll feel old yet?

Anywho, 10 PAX gathered in the Burt Center lot and readied for a nice little beatdown. M.Callahan was asked for inspiration as I prepared to Q, but she “didn’t feel like doing your (my) job for you (me)”. Oh. Okay. Yes, ma’am. How about we go to bed?

YHC awoke at 0630, still unsure what the beatdown would bring. So, I did what I do best. I improvised.

On the way out of the house, I scouted my garage for potential props. Scanning, scanning, scanning….aha! There! A bag full of old, beat up golf balls. That’ll work.

At 0700, 10 PAX set off into the 42 degree gloom.

Warm Up

Jog to the Dale (you know, the one by the hill), and circle up for:
-SSH x 20
-Good Morning x 15
-Windmill x 15
-Squats x 15
-CDD, IC x 15

The Thang

Before we left the lot, YHC procured some cones from Saban (gracias), which I now distributed in a star-shaped pattern while the PAX blatantly disregarded orders to do something while they waited. “Guys…seriously. Do something.” Once the cones were placed, We established a center point and the task was explained.

In pairs, do 10 star jumps, bear crawl to a cone, do 10 Burpees, Bear Crawl back to center, perform 10 star jumps. Squat hold til e’erbody done. Rotate.
Then, 10 SJs, crab walk to cone, 20 Merkins, Crab walk to center, 10 SJs, then squat hold. Rotate.
Next, 10 SJs, LungeWonk to cone, 30 squats, LungeWonk back, 10 SJs, squat hold. Rotate.
10 SJs, Side lunge to cone, 40 Box Cutters, side lunge to center, 10 SJs, squat hold. Rotate.
10 SJs, Bear Crawl out, 50 Big Boy sit-ups, bear crawl back, 10 SJs, Squat hold. Recover.

Big Boy Sit-ups don’t play.

Next, the PAX again were instructed to do something, this time actually getting something done. Big shout to Shut-In for taking the reigns and running the PAX up the hill and back just because. YHC decided to bring a little taste of the Bull to Cary. A few braves souls in attendance had already done the Bull, so flashbacks were occuring. YHC set up two lines of golf balls and split the PAX into teams. Big shout to Assisi up in Durham for the idea. The task, bear crawl the distance between the two line, pick up a golf ball, bunny hop back. Repeato. For 4 straight minutes. At the end, count up the totals, winners take a victory lap, losers do something miserable. The idea was to do three rounds, like we did at the Bull, but alas, Shutty had had enough and politely excused himself, shouting, “It’s…uh…7:30. I gotta go…” How convenient. Whatevs. Somehow, team 1 pulled off the upset (cheated mightily), so they were treated to a victory lap around the dale. Team 2 were subjected to Burpees AMRAP until Team 1 returned. YHC didn’t realize just how long it would take Team 1 to run the quarter mile lap, so an audible was called and Team 2 did some Mary after maybe 30 burpees or so.

Next, we dropped off our props at the cars and zoomed to the backside of the Community Center, where it was noted that “Nothing good ever happens back here.” Very astute observation, Michelob. Music to thine ears.

Team 1 – BTTW As Long As Possible; Team 2 – People’s Chair. Once all the guys go down, switch it up so Team 2 does BTTW ALAP and Team 1 does People’s Chair.
Repeato.

Next, mosey to the rock pile and grab a decent, non-traveling rock.
Curls, IC x 10
Press, IC x 10
Extensions, IC x 10

Now, 1s paint the lines up and down the lot while 2s continue Rock work:
Rock Row, IC x 10
Rock your body, IC x 10
1s are back, so 2s paint the lines while 1s Rock Row and Body Rock

1s Paint the lines again, 2s continue rock work:
Curls, IC x 10
Press, IC x 10
Extensions, IC x 10
1s are back, so 2s paint the lines while 1s Curl, Press, and Extend their rocks

As a group, finish strong with:
Rock Row, IC x 10
Rock your body, IC x 10

Return rocks to pile. Jog back toward the Burt Center, Billy Running the last 80 yards or so. We got back just in time for a little…

Mary
American Hammers, IC x 33

COT
Count-o-rama – 9ish (10 for half an hour, but not sure that counts as a post…)
Nam-o-rama – 2 RESPECTs, 1 hate, 6 others, 1 ghost
Announcements – Just guess. Also, Rocksteady (hails from Brier Creek AOs) is organizing an event. Check out
Prayer requests – Lots of health concerns, specifically cancer. Praises for good health as well.

NMS
– Lots of missing PAX today. But great to see some new faces! Welcome Rocksteady (Any relation to BeBop, perchance?), and Kotters to Gut! The Achilles looked good today. No more excuses.
– Where was Burt? Ma Bell? Goose? Coney? Ollie? Tecumseh? Sleeping? Oh. You were sleeping. #dbp
– Not mentioned above…the PAX knocked out their 20 Merkins, in cadence, dutifully paying their admission into the 2md F at Ma’s later that night.
– Did we, really? If you weren’t there, don’t bother arguing me on this.
– I think I saw tears in Shutty’s eyes as he high-tailed it to the parking lot. The Bull moved him, deeply.
– Again, I appreciate the PAX’s willingness to put up with my constant improv during these beatdowns. I’ll do better.
– Calling cadence after the Billy Run = eating popcorn with a fork. It can be done, but why would you do that?
– I’m missing a few golf balls. I believe a few might still be in Franklin’s pockets
– Cheater, Cheater, Pumpkin Eater.
– That’s all I have to say about that.
– Thanks to Term Paper and Fluoride for keeping the RESPECT alive today!
– Every time someone mentions the workouts at the NC Museum of Art, Moline gets visibly uncomfortable. I bet he just got the willies just reading that last sentence.
– You’re not alone, bro.
– Not my strongest work with the whole, “hey, do something while I set up these cones” thing. I would advise others to plan better than that. I’m expecting an official reprimand in the mail in the next few days from HQ. I’ll get better once I hit 30.
– Okay, gotta get back to work.
– CUITG

Callahan