When Goose and Ma Bell rolled up to the BO AO, the only other vehicle was a suspicious utility truck. Getting close to crunch time, we figured everyone had been skeered by the cold. I mean this is Burt Spin Class weather. Slowly but surely, they came and as the witching hour approached, we had a hardy group, including a spy (Uncle Leo) from the mother ship – allegedly in town for a “swim meet.” Good cover story, bro. We’ll go with that, sure. My mind whirled – OK is it ready position, exercise, in cadence? No, wait. Starting position move, in cadence, exercise. OK, Ma Bell’s not getting on Dredd’s naughty list. Hey, it’s 5:45. Follow me.

Out Waldo we went toward Academy. When we got to the intersection, some PAX started to peel off to the right toward the bank. Nope, we’re going left into the construction zone. Up Academy and to the Arts Center and circle up for:

Warm-Up Part Deux (Part one was the run, OK?)

  • 15 x GM IC
  • 10 Squat Imperial Walkers IC (a little..we’ll call it rumblechatter..on this one)
  • 20 x Mountain Climbers IC…Hold it..signature move Merkins? No, just some calf stretches. Relax fellas
  • Now, flip it over for: 10 x Crab Cakes IC

Gimme a quick count – 9. Nooooo! Dammit, why can there never be an even number? WHY!!?? The spy is taking notes. OK, get it together Ma Bell; you’ll think of something. Determined for the PAX to pay for the sins of the skeert and the fartsackers, here is what we did:

The Thang
Hop up the Arts Center stairs, split up and plank walk down the rails on either side and meet back in front of the stairs. Repeato with right leg hops up the stairs, rail plank walk, and then left leg up the stairs and a final plank walk. OK, let’s go around back to the playground. Run around the arts center and the school, down the stairs and line up on the sidewalk at the bottom of the hill. Originally, we were going to partner carry up the hill, but the whole odd number thing…Anyway, here we go:

Run up the hill and back down, do a single merkin burpee, run back up the hill and back down, do a double merkin burpee. Do that up to 10, then people’s chair on the fence at the bottom. When everyone is done, we need to climb back down the ladder – decreasing merkin burpees starting with 9-merkin burpee, then 8-merkin burpee, down to a single merkin burpee. No run. OYO.
Repeato on the hill but instead do star jumps after each trip up and back down, starting with 1 and increasing 1 with each subsequent trip, up to 10. Peoples Chair when you’re done. After a 5-count down the line, follow me:

Up the stairs and over to the wheelchair ramp. Bear crawl up the ramp, take a right, then jog down to the playground. Where are those benches? Oh, there it is. Grab a bench for:

  • 20 x Dips IC
  • 15 x Irkins IC
  • 15 x Derkins on my count

Jog over to the mini basketball court and line up on the near end line for: suicide, 5 merkin count down the line, another suicide. Jog back up and around to the front of the Arts Center and circle up for some:

Mary

  • 20 x Dying Cockroaches IC
  • 15 x Hello Dolly (she said to tell Callahan hi) Hold it…
  • 15 x low slow flutters. Hold it…
  • 10 x box cutters

Indian Run back up Academy to the intersection with Waldo, then AYG to the cars and circle up.

COT
Name-a-rama (3 respects, 5 mehs, 1 hate). Welcome Uncle Leo, the spy from CLT!
Announcements: The Mule March 5th, the F3 Nation 5 year party that same night (recover on the drive), the Bull on March 12th. Taking T-shirt orders for The Bull until the 17th.
Prayers: Continued prayers for YHC’s friend Jamie and her daughter Ana as well as M Grease Monkey who is still recovering from the mold infestation and other ailments
BOM: Ma Bell took us out

NMS

  • Turns out the suspicious utility truck belonged to Pergo. My bad.
  • About halfway into the initial run down Academy to the Arts Center, YHC’s right Achilles started aching. Some beach, that hurts. Hence, the calf stretches after the Mountain Clinmbers. It still hurts.
  • Pain is nature’s way of telling you to slow down. Ibuprofen is man’s way of saying “make me.”
  • 2 days in a row for visitors from Charlotte. All spy jokes aside, it is great to have visitors from other areas. Make them feel welcome!
  • Grease Monkey was having a hard time following directions – something about those bricks are cold and I don’t have the same gloves as you, Ma Bell. Whatevs.
  • Speaking of Grease, he seemed genuinely perplexed not to have finished first on the stair hop, rail plank thing in the beginning. Grease don’t like to lose. One point for #respect. The sweet taste of victory didn’t last long
  • Really? One more “man” couldn’t have joined us to make it an even 10 so YHC could have stuck to his original plan? Ooh, it’s 19 degrees. Brrr. Spoon me, M. I want an analysis of Cary/Apex posts. My guess is 80% or more have an odd number of PAX
  • Mad respect to the guys on the right hill. It is longer and steeper than the one on the left. There were no complaints, just work
  • That’s all the stream of consciousness I got at the moment, but I’ll leave you with this: it was a real pleasure to lead a fine group of hardy men this morning. We set out to do some stuff, and stuff we did. Well done, gentlemen

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